.....i was born free........

............ I was born free & untouched by the facts of life,as i grew i learnt my lessons in a hard way, some made me sturbborn, some left me dead with emotions, life is beautiful, its we who fail to see the beauty it holds.........today Iam ready to fight with world ,today iam no longer a small child gazing for help & hand...........i don't wait for tears to roll down my cheeks in public, i rather prefer to cry in dark......... today i don't pain myself for the wrong that was done to me, i rather now don't give such a chance to play on me........... iam now a fighter , a stronger being, today I feel iam complete and have a world within , a world of my dreams , a world where i rule, where i decide the parameters of my life, today iam independent, iam ME.............. because i know this world is MINE & i myself will create my life and the purpose of me still being alive.......................

...WHY IAM here?....

... why iam here?? We often come across this question,some of us try to go a step futher to try & find an answer to it but many of us just ignore it thinking its waste of time but is it really a waste or is it something which we need to know so that are purpose of life can reach to a level that is beyond,that is indeed the real reason of our existence......we try to shadow things by giving all the odd reasons,we don't have time,we are busy and what not but then if we don't have time for answering THE MOST important question then what are we actually living for........we are not here in this world because we were suppose to be but we are here because we are meant to be...there is a very thin line between life and living...and the difference is very huge.... life is a step futher to it,its all about discovering & exploring who you are and whats your sole purpose of existence.........its all about connecting with your soul and connecting to that supernatural power which controls the entire life chakra, its a level of complete awareness of oneself...............

..too much of LOVE........

Too much of love is fatal,it can take away your smile and turn them into those little drops with endless emotions for the smallest reason...it drives you crazy,it makes your mind a slave,it rules your action,u cant stop yourself in acting in this strange way,you just dont want to be this way...but the feeling is so intense that it blocks your mind,you hate yourself,hate everything of this order,you want to change it so badly but nothing seemz to work,you dont know how love has changed from possesion to obsession...but is it really that you are obsessed or is it the result of your thinking a little too much.....love takes weird routes of expressions,sometimes in the form of tears and sometimes in the form of wild madness, you seeem to loose the pataince in you,it xplodes and burns you along and then the ashes of you are left, you die every now and then and ironically the reason is too stupid to even consider but thats how love makes you behave.....the world seems to end and the light seem to make you blind and you feel you have lost your life in that moment .......and when that moment is gone you realize ,YOU WERE JUST THINKING ALL CRAP........

: )

..tell me y???????

i dont know what to say, i dont even know how to say..........but something is bothering,something is there in my mind continuosly creating whirlpool for me ...i feel terrible for iam just not getting way to come out of it..sometimes we dont have much to say because we just feel we are lost..we dont have clue..we keep on thinking for no reason,endless is our search for that question which we never have known..how stupid we are at times,having all the knowledge of books we fail to answer the simple questions of life.....may be the reason is books never teach you the lessons of life n probably they can never , for these lessons are to be experienced,need to be felt and its that essence of feeeling that creates the difference....as a human we keep on thinking of the next moment.....the moment of which we have no idea,but still most of the time we think about it ,but the most funny part is we forget to think about now.......... most of the time we are planning for the next moment....moment thats not certain ,moment that we dont know if we will be able to witness or not................i try to figure out how my life has been so far...an amazing journey,full of bumpy rides...these years have taught me no matter how hard i try there certain things that will always come in my way and i have to go through them...there is no escape,there is no chance i can find other way.........i have learn to love myself,this love has given me the strength to be alone not lonely in this world...because even when iam alone i have myself...there is nothing that can complete my life ,everything else can just add on to it...

..........I may not have........

I may not have written anything for you,
i may not have been talking enough with you..

....but at the back of my mind i always miss you..
i miss the little conversations we had,

i miss the fun i used to have,
we have grown now,

life seems realy busy
but still in the back of my mind,

i think of you,
those moments are so clear in front of me,

i kan never ever let them slip out of me...
years are passing by & time is almost fleeting,

at times the fear of loosing you comes all around me,
dat shadow takes da light away from me,

it scares ,it makes me little mean
but then no matter how far ,
i know even u will be also missing me..................

...story of a child.....

He was an innocent child born with a smile,he used to play & dance with joy,his parents thought their life got completed with him. He was their perfect son ,their only pride.They dreamt of a life but things got changed.....

.....now every moment dey fight,the world has made their son wild.The drugs got him entangled & he snuff it day & night.His life is now aliving hell,his parents now hardly feel they are alive,it changed their life & ruined everything they ever had........drug took away their child ,their love their life.........

......... now they dont want to live they simply want to die,life has made them helpless,they dont know what to do to make things alright,he was untouched with the reality,now he lives in a disturbed world,he cheat ,he borrow and he even steal for a drag,that made him what they never thought he would be,his mind no longer thinks normal,no longer feels,no longer understands that these drugs have destroyed him...........

........ he deserve to live alife but now he just love the darkness & world of illusion...he lives in a state of not being,always in pain......he is running hes insecure,it seems nothing can now cure..wish things will get alright, he will again be alive....for nobody deserves to be hated & treated thi s way by life.....who should be blamed for what he is going through, its not him,its not his parents nor the drugs that are widely sold.............BUT its the choice he made for his life.he chose to be where he is........ i really wish he could have made a wiser pick because the wrong choice has ruined everything inside of him...................

..LOVE ME.........................

Love me not just for the times we have been together,
love me not just for the smiles we shared during the way,

love me not just for the moment we felt close,
love me not just for those sleeples nights we had thinking each other,

love me even wen i will be far and not near,
love me even when i cant make you smile,

love me even when i say da harsh words,
love me even when nobody likes the way i look,

love me when i say you dont,
love me because thats what i need the most,

i may not be perfect,
i may not be the best gal,i may not be good
but iam not even bad,

but all i know is i love you
and i will always do.......

...........BEcause OF you.............

Its because of you that i know what love is,
its because of you that i know how perfect love can be,

its because of you,i can smile with my heart loud,
its because of you i can dance with crowd,

its because of you, i know how stupid i can be,
its because of you i know how incomplete my life can be

its because of you that i have known myself,
its because of you that i know how mad i can be.............

..I doNT kNOw............

I don't know wats love ,
but it cant be different from the way iam feeling for you,

it has to be love,
coz i never thougth of loving you,

but one day i just found myself in love with you,
it happened and how it happened i dont know,

now my world seems to be incomplete without you,
you mean the world to me

,i wake up thinking of you
and even in my dreams i jus think of you ,

you make me go mad,
you make me talk foolish

but derz nothing i can do
for i love you and i really do

,your words are magic
,your love feels great,

i feel you
and feel the love we share.....

....MeMOriES OF pASt.................

Memories of past are so clear in mah mind,
i can see myself crying and laughing at the same time,

those were the magical days,
they were unusual,

i used to be carefree,
i used to be like a freak,

jumping like a bird,
and figthing like a bee,

the tears were of joy,
the wounds were out of fun,

they used to heal fast,
they used to go fast,

now things have change,
nothing seems that way,

now the world bothers me,
now i feel the pain.....................

.sometymes.............

Some times thesky seems to be out of my reach,
sometimes i feel iam lgging behind,

sometimes i feel the winds of change,
sometimes i feel they will never be mine,

sometimes i feel the ocean of tears,
sometimes i feel iam drowing deep inside,

sometimes the pain kill me from within ,
sometimes i feel dead yet alive,

sometimes i smile to heal the wounds inside,
sometimes i laugh with no emotions outside,

sometimes i wana run to a deserted land,
sometimes i wana to fly high.......

...dATs thE wAY Iam........

pEople dont like me
and so do i,

i want to kill myself
and cry till i die,

i nailed myself
and burnt my veins

but still iam alive
for i love to be in pain

people say iam crazy
people say iam bad,

yeah dats me
and dats da way iam.....
: )

...........wen I.........

wEN I saw you for da first time,
i was too young and you were much younger,

wen i held your hand it felt nothing like ever,
wen i loved you ,i felt this love wil last forever,

you walked away with someone else and left me alone,
it felt like unfelt and made me numb,

when i woke up,i saw you were gone
but something inside of me told i have to move on,

do i have to cry for someone like you,
what makes you think i will be always waiting for you?

now iam happy and always gay,
your presence have now swayed away,

i can feel the heat,
i can feel the rain,

now i know am free
and free of the pain................

...sitting on the edge.............

Sitin on the edge of the cliff,m tryn to ask myself

Is it where I shud have been?

No matter wat I do,its happens to me,

betrayed in love and left in dark deep

Where have I gone wrong,I ask myself

Nothing I hear juss da sound of my tear

People have hurt me,& I have cried like hell

But nobody bothered to care for help.

It has been like this,It will be like dis

But I wish thingz cud change & I kud have died in peace

loving YOU...

Loving you have changed my life,
i have bekum nuts n little wize et the same time

knowing you i have known myself,
i can cry like a small baby over tiny stuff,

thinking of u makes me feel light,
even when the stress of life is high,

most of the time i dream of you,
it looks so perfect,its looks so right
n i know everything will be all right..

in your love i feel the unfelt
in your words i hear the beat of my heart,

only if you see you will know,
how much i love & how much i care for you

people will come,people will go,
but my love will forever go......